Different Seasons. Same Stress
Lately I've caught myself saying the same sentence over and over again.
"Things will calm down after we move."
The funny thing is, I've heard myself say versions of that sentence for years.
Things will calm down after the wedding.
After I lose the weight.
After the business gets established.
After the baby sleeps through the night.
After this busy season.
There always seems to be another after.
For a long time, I thought the goal was to finally arrive at a season where life wasn't so demanding. A season where I could catch my breath, establish a routine, and feel like I was finally on top of things.
But the older I get, the more I'm beginning to wonder if that season doesn't really exist.
Life has a way of trading one set of responsibilities for another. The wedding becomes the marriage. The new baby becomes a toddler. One project turns into the next opportunity. One transition quietly gives way to another.
The seasons change.
The invitation to care for ourselves doesn't.
I've been thinking about this a lot lately because, if I'm honest, life feels full. We're getting ready to move into a new home. I'm balancing motherhood, running my business, coaching clients, and all of the little responsibilities that somehow fill every open space on the calendar.
It's a good season.
A full season.
And yet, I still catch myself believing that if I can just get through this one thing, everything will settle down.
I said it again this week.
"Things will calm down after we move."
The moment I heard myself say it, I laughed.
Not because moving isn't stressful. It absolutely is.
But because I recognized the pattern.
I've been waiting for the next season to give me permission to slow down.
Maybe that's why I've found myself reading so much about stress lately. Not because I wanted another wellness strategy or productivity tip.
I think I was looking for permission to stop feeling like I was somehow doing stress wrong.
I've been reading Burnout, The Body Keeps the Score, and Why Zebras Don't Get Ulcers. Each book approaches stress from a different angle, but they've all been pointing me toward the same realization.
Our bodies don't necessarily know when the stressful moment is over.
That idea has stayed with me.
How often do we finish one task only to immediately start thinking about the next? How often do we solve one problem without ever letting ourselves acknowledge that we just carried something hard?
I know I do.
It has made me wonder how many times I've expected my body to keep up with a pace that even my mind hasn't had time to process.
Maybe that's why the question I ask myself is starting to change.
Instead of asking,
"How can I get everything done?"
I'm asking,
"What would help me feel a little more grounded today?"
Some days the answer is going for a walk. Some days it's closing my laptop a little earlier. Some days it's calling a friend, sitting on the porch with a cup of tea, or simply taking a deep breath before moving on to the next task.
The answer changes.
The question stays the same.
I don't think wellness is about finding a life without stress anymore.
I think it's about learning how to care for ourselves in the middle of it.
Because if there's one thing I'm learning, it's that life will probably always ask something of us.
There will always be another season.
Another transition.
Another responsibility.
Another reason to believe we'll slow down "after this."
Maybe the goal isn't to wait for a life that feels less full.
Maybe the goal is to become someone who knows how to care for herself in every season.
I'm still learning what that looks like.
But I have a feeling that's where real wellness begins.
So this week, instead of asking yourself what you need to get done next, maybe ask a different question:
What would help you feel a little more grounded today?
I'd love to know what comes to mind.
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